It amazes me that while we go through this journey, we are often resistant to getting help from others.  We are usually good at trying to get help and get support for our kids, but often think that it is selfish to get help for ourselves. The ironic thing is that much of the help we seek for our children is centered on helping them reach out and interact with others . . .and yet it is the one thing that we resist. The truth of the matter is that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to help anyone else . . . including your child.  You need to be at the top of your game so that you can give your family the very best of YOU.

• The first thing on your plan should be to get your home environment in shape.  Clutter is VERY difficult for kids to handle . . . all kids.It is also difficult for US to handle.  It is important to keep the energy in your home positive, and that is very difficult when you are constantly stepping over or looking for something.  The anxiety level in a home is automatically raised when it is visually distracting.  When de-cluttering a home, it is important to look at the obvious, as well as the less obvious, forms of clutter.An environment can be cluttered by “stuff,” excessive background noise (radios, TVs. etc.), too many smells (good or bad), or artificial light (use as much natural light as possible).  As I mentioned before, small changes are best for you and your child.  Your child will not benefit from de-cluttering if you spend all day ignoring, or worse, yelling at your family as you have exhausted yourself trying to get it all done in one day.  I faced a problem with clutter in my own home, and once I started working on making my home clutter free, I was able to see a decrease in unwanted behaviors, an increase in language, and most of all, increased happiness in my family as a whole.We now have a comfortable place for my family to relax and enjoy each other. If you need help with this Flylady can help you.

• Are you taking care of yourself physically?  If you haven’t been to the doctor or a dentist in the past year, then it is time to get everything checked out.  Once you get a clean bill of health, consider taking up physical activity on a regular basis.  Regularly scheduled physical activity will decrease the number of days that you are sick, and will also increase your ability to handle the stress that you are facing.  Again, I know that you probably don’t have much extra time, but finding an activity that you like and participating in it on a regular basis will make you more productive during the other hours in your week.  The increased health and decreased stress that you receive from exercise will give you a huge opportunity to give your family the very best of YOU!!!  If you need help with this Jonathan can help you.

• If you are having difficulty in the relationship with your significant other, has it gotten better by changing your attitude, cleaning up the clutter, and taking care of yourself?  Spending time as a family not trying to “fix” the diagnosis, but rather playing as a family may give you the balance and perspective you need to see each other as “in this together.”   If your parenting partner is not living in the home, take time to talk to each other.  Talk about what you are planning to do with the kids so that the other parent can ask questions about what the kids did when they come back to your home, or to add excitement before the event takes place.  This can help both parents see each other as part of the same team in regards to raising your children.  Often times when you get balance and perspective in your life, the relationships seem to take care of themselves, but other times this is not the case.  Your plan may need to include seeing a counselor as an individual, as a couple, or as a family.  If your plan includes seeing a counselor, try to find one that has experience in working with families raising children with special needs.  If you want to talk to others who are dealing with the same issues that you are, our Sensory Nanny Support Group can help you.